Return to Egypt and the Sphynx Who Loved Me...

I realize that most people who follow this blog think that international business travel is all glamorous and that I’m living the life of a rock star. Some of this, perhaps, is true. This job does indeed have its wonderful moments when I can be a pampered tourist on the company’s dime. However, the vast majority of this travel consists of me wedged into an unknown airline’s economy seat (which will barely accommodate their own 4’ tall Lilliputian citizens…much less my 6’4” frame). Then, when we get to the airport, we must continue the compression at an even greater rate. So, imagine fitting FIVE full-size Americans (plus a local driver, PLUS all of our luggage) into a taxi meant to seat four local people. Yeah, that’s glamorous all right!

The next morning, we had to visit our customer in Cairo. To get there, our distributor hired a huge van to carry us around. We loaded up the van and let the excitement begin! I did my best to film the journey from our hotel to the customer site (a trip that took 40 minutes each way). We were able to see a lot of the regular Cairo life through the windows of our air-conditioned van. I captured a bit of it on film.

As you watch the video, be sure to notice the prison van that we pass. This dark-blue van is the Egyptian answer to the “Paddy Wagon” from America 100 years ago. They actually lock people up in this wagon to transport them from place to place. It’s somewhat like a dog catcher’s van…complete with little windows for the prisoners to see the outside world and catch a breath of “fresh[er]” air. I see these wagons every day that we are here. It makes me think that Egypt is being discriminatory against its Irish immigrants!

When we arrived at the customer site, I was offered “coffee” to drink, which I readily accepted. While I appreciate my hosts’ generosity, the “coffee” I was given is of the Turkish kind. This means that it consists of mostly coffee grounds. It is so thick, that you can literally stand a spoon on end by sticking it into the black muck. I did my best to drink it so as not to offend anyone.
As soon as I was done, my boss (Phil) walks over with what appeared to be a fruit smoothie! He had the decency to offer me a bit to knock the coffee grounds from the back of my throat. I’d like to know where I was when these drinks were being offered (probably working…)

During our entire time at the customer site, we had to deal with their elevators. Not that there’s anything wrong with their elevators; they do indeed lift us from floor to floor. The only “problem” is that the elevators don’t have doors. The best way to understand my meaning is to watch the video…the video of the Elevators Of Death…

Once we’re at work, I felt quite comfortable filming with my camera. So, you are going to see us doing what we do to earn a paycheck. We’re operating our equipment, talking about throughput and data integrity. Pretty boring stuff overall, but this is what pays the bills. This is why we are here.

If you have been following my blog, you should know by now that Tony Novoa is a business partner of mine. But I want you to understand that over the last three years, he’s become much more than that to me. He is very much like an older and wiser brother to me; I have learned SO MUCH from him and I have every respect and admiration for his abilities.

Having said that, I have also found Tony to be a master of slapstick comedy. While we were at the customer site, we had a bit of “down time” and Tony asked to hold my video camera. I handed it to him and showed him the basics of its operations. As he was playing with it, he accidently knocked an un-opened can of Coca-Cola off the table and hit the ground and rolled around quite a bit. Tony picked it up, set it on the table, and started to move as if he would open the can. I exclaimed, “You’re not going to open that, are you?!?!” To which Tony replied “No, of course not…” and then he opened the can! I wish I had my video camera rolling at that exact instant, because when he pulled the tab, the entire content of the can exploded and deposited itself on Tony’s business suit. I nearly wet myself from laughing so hard…as did Diego!

As you will see on the video, Tony explains that when I asked “You’re not going to open that?”, he thought I was referring to my video camera which he had been playing with…which is certainly a reasonable assumption. In reality, I meant was he going to open the now explosive can of Coca-Cola. What fun! I still laugh about this…

Later that evening, after Tony changed into dry clothes, we went on a Nile dinner cruise. The food was very good and the entertainment was enjoyable. However, I’ve done this river cruise before, so I knew what to expect.

Well, that’s all for now. Suffice to say all is well, I’m happy, the company is doing well, and I’ve captured what I hope is some interesting video for my friends…

Love you all!

Last Day in Cape Town - Let's Go Mountain Climbing!

OK, as usual, the blog is a little out of date. I am now in Muscat, Oman...which wasn't even on the original itinerary. It has been a very, very busy several weeks. Good news is that I finally have an Internet connection that is fast enough to allow me to post some videos. Who would have thought that I'd have to go to Oman for that to happen?

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Our last day in Cape Town was spent climbing mountains. We didn’t plan this particularly well, because the clothes that we wore to explore those mountains would be the same ones that we would wear for the next 20+ hours as we flew from South Africa to Egypt. Yep – smelly, sweaty, locker-room-like clothes that would torment our fellow plane-mates for nearly a full day. Not that their bearded, robe-wearing, smelly-sandaled bodies were any better…but you know, at least we wore deodorant.

And when I say “climb[ing] that mountain,” I actually mean “we rode a cable car up the mountain.” I mean, come on, everybody who reads this blog knows me…so who am I kidding? We didn’t “climb” anything. Although, once dropped off at the top of Table Mountain, we did go up and down the various cracks and crevices that a million years of rain have made. Even THAT was enough to make me winded! As you’ll hear in the video, I’m having trouble breathing. Hard to believe that I stopped smoking 2 years ago…but there you have it! I was near 20,000 feet or something while filming…so give me a break! I was camera man, director, producer, and actor…there was a lot of pressure up there! Plus, there’s very little oxygen at those altitudes! In fact, I’m pretty sure they make astronauts train on this mountain before they send them to space.

The cable car itself is quite an experience. It’s shaped somewhat like a flying saucer from a 50’s sci-fi movie (which lends credence to my theory about astronaut training). The cool thing is that it spins on its way up (and down). This is to make sure that everybody gets a good view of the awesome scenery. Otherwise, big people would probably squish the smaller folks against the windows in their efforts to see the rock face and / or sea-side views

Upon arriving at the top, the entire ticket-buying cable-car masses are left on their own. Everybody is free to explore 3,500 ft. sheer cliffs as he or she sees fit. As for me, I decided to explore the “off the beaten path” track and wound up seeing sides of the mountain that no man was meant to see. I filmed what I could of this adventure…but it simply wasn’t possible to hold a camera to capture the best footage while swinging from ledge to ledge and grasping jagged rocks with my fingertips while supporting both my weight and the weight of my boss’ boss (Scott). But I think the footage that I did manage to take speaks largely for itself…

Cape of Good Hope

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Unlike yesterday, when we were completely free to decide what to do, today was an organized “fun day.” At this point, our distributors haven’t arrived so it’s only my follow Scranton employees and me enjoying the activities. The organizers had originally requested a van for the eight of us, but apparently the van was in use…so the tour company sent a bus that seats 44 people. We had plenty of room to stretch out; I wish my flight over the Atlantic had been this spacious!

The first thing we did was visit Sandy Bay…the only “official” nude beach in all of South Africa! Unfortunately, a couple of things conspired to keep us from enjoying the full experience. First, it’s nearly winter in the Southern Hemisphere so the nudists are mostly clothed now. Second, we were up very high on the cliff and the telephoto lens on my camera isn’t very good.

After our attempted voyeurism, we took a boat to visit some seals on a rock in the ocean. I’m not exactly sure why this is such a tourist attraction; it’s just a bunch of rocks in the ocean with some seals laying about sunning themselves. There were some baby seals, and I could understand the attraction had we been allowed to “go Eskimo” on them with baseball bats…but all we were allowed to do was take pictures.

I think my favorite part of the seal outreach program was the boat ride. I was truly amazed by how close the captain was willing to get to the rocks. We were just a few feet away from being dashed to death against the rocks. Any survivors, I imagine, would have been devoured by the seals. What fun!

Luis Wasserman also provided a bit of entertainment when he needed a pair of sunglasses and attempted pricing negotiations with a local vendor. He ended up calling the vendor “crazy” and a bunch of other things. As a result, relations between South Africa and Colombia are now at an all-time low. We keep telling Luis to mind his manners when he travels internationally, but our advice falls on deaf ears.

It was then time to check out the penguins. I’d seen penguins before…but only in captivity. These were free-range penguins living a life of swimming, catching fish, sunning themselves, and avoiding the Great White sharks that eat them like popcorn. A few of them were walking about, but the great unwashed penguin masses seemed to be huddled near one another on the beach, face down, snoozing.

We eventually made it to the Cape of Good Hope, which was the highlight of our tour. Contrary to popular belief, this is NOT the southernmost part of the African continent. The southernmost point is actually 90 miles to the east-southeast. Nonetheless, this is the point of land on which Bartholomeu Dias landed in 1488. He gave it the name “Cabo de Tormentas” which means “Cape of Storms.” I can certainly see why he named it this; the day we were there, the winds were blowing like mad. It would have been very, very rough in a boat off-shore…and we were there on a “good” day! The King of Portugal, John II, wanted to colonize this part of the word and his marketing people thought that “Cape of Good Hope” might be a better name to attract would-be settlers. It’s been known as such ever since.

The next day, we visited a shopping center called the “Century Mall.” I went there primarily to find some books to read…the supply of books I took on this trip have mostly been read. Time to re-stock.

The Devil and Pirate Van Hunks in Cape Town, S. Africa

Well, the blog is a week behind. I’ve been very busy entertaining our distributors, going to formal business dinners, delivering presentations, and doing my regular day-job as well. My days have been starting around 7:00 a.m. and ending around midnight. Sure, we managed to have some fun (as the video will attest), but we also worked really hard. Work hard, play hard…that’s our way!

My first impression of Cape Town is that it’s windy. We may have the “Windy City” of Chicago, but it can’t hold a match to the winds here. This became evident when we decided to charter a catamaran out of the harbor for a few hours’ sail. On board was my friend and coworker Sue Dommeyer, her husband Jay, Todd Radtke, the captain, first mate, and me. As we were leaving the harbor for the open ocean, we clocked 60 knots of wind on the wind indicator.

60 knots converts to 69 miles per hour. Hurricane winds begin at 74 miles an hour…so we were experiencing what hard-core sailors would call a “stiff breeze.” For a moment, our captain had a look of sheer and utter terror on his face as we all grabbed on to handrails to hold on for dear life as our catamaran bobbed about like a cork. I had always heard the “cats” were supposed to be very stable in rough weather, but I quickly learned otherwise.

Once we entered the open ocean, the wind and seas died down. The captain relaxed and even told us that we’d set a new speed record…22 knots! It was smooth sailing from here on out. We encountered whales (we never actually saw them, but we could see their tale-tell signs of breathing through their blow-holes), big cargo ships, and a shark. All in all, it was a very pleasant day to be on the water.

One of the most striking features of Cape Town, whether viewed from the land or the water, is Table Mountain. The mountain gets its name from its very flat top and steep sides. It rises approximately 3,500 feet above sea level.

One of the coolest aspects of the mountain is the clouds that form on the top. On an otherwise perfectly cloudless day, the Table Mountain will often be covered by a “table cloth” of white clouds that form and dissipate as if by magic. Oh, sure, there’s probably some fancy scientific explanation for the phenomenon, but the local legend is much more fun. Apparently, the clouds are actually the visible results of a smoking contest between the Devil and a local pirate named Van Hunks. How cool is that?

Over the next couple of days, I will try to get more South Africa video edited for the blog. In the meantime, enjoy a virtual sail around the Cape Town Harbor…